Deadpool shot Wolverine in the face for Marvel’s big X-Men crossover

After many months of anticipation, the X-Men are finally throwing their big super-powered party slash diplomatic summit slash fashion showcase event, and the Hellfire Gala is the hottest ticket around.

From the Fantastic Four to Doctor Doom, and Russian dignitaries to Shiar alien ones, truly a comic book event has never been more perfectly calibrated to bring you the Monday Funnies promise of the “society pages of superhero lives,” from the numerous real-world celebrities that Marvel artists snuck into the Gala crowds to the small moments of crossover fun between Marvel Comics umbrellas.

Except Deadpool.

What else is happening in the pages of our favorite comics? We’ll tell you. Welcome to Monday Funnies, Polygon’s weekly list of the books that our comics editor enjoyed this past week. It’s part society pages of superhero lives, part reading recommendations, part “look at this cool art.” There may be some spoilers. There may not be enough context. But there will be great comics. (And if you missed the last edition, read this.)

Deadpool and Wolverine fight on the ocean-swept rocks, while arguing. “I’m a mutant!” Deadpool protests. “You’re no mutant!” Wolverine retorts. “I”m an honorary mutant, then! Which means I’m allowed to get #$%&@faced at mutant parties!” in X-Force #20 (2023).

Image: Benjamin Percy, Joshua Cassara/Marvel Comics

Wade you are not dressed nearly fashionably enough, put those floaties back on at least.

Emma Frost tells Kitty Pryde that she thinks Captain America might fancy her until she reads his mind more deeply and realizes that she just reminds him of his mother. “She was born at the turn of the previous century,” Emma wails. “I need a drink,” in Marauders #21 (2023).

Image: Gerry Duggan, Matteo Lolli/Marvel Comics

The Gala proper kicked off in an issue of Marauders, with Emma Frost as the hostess for the entire Marvel universe, and it’s got a lot of great little moments. Doctor Strange sighing in relief at not being the most overdressed person in the room, Ben Grimm finding the more disreputable mutants in their gambling corner, and then, also this.

Mister Sinister egotistically attempts to hobnob with Thor and Black Panther. “What are you guys? Kings? Gods? I’m pretty much those things too.” Then he screams as Nanny, a small mutant in an egg-shaped costume, appears beside him holding a champagne flute. “Don’t be so modest, Essex,” she says. “Nathaniel is also an abductor, abuser, and murderer of children.” in Hellions #12, Marvel Comics (2023).

Image: Zeb Wells, Stephen Segovia/Marvel Comics

And then there was this pure Venture Bros. moment in Hellions.

“Everyone shut the fuck up, there’s something wrong.” yells Ryan to a shocked groups of poolside friends in The Nice House on the Lake #1, (2023).

Image: James Tynion IV, Álvaro Martínez Bueno/DC Comics

Am I good to talk about the twist at the end of James Tynion’s The Nice House on the Lake #1 now? If not, keep scrolling.

A group of acquaintances united by their one nice but weird buddy are all invited to a weekend at a lake house to celebrate Vaccine Summer 2024, only for their buddy to reveal that he’s the vanguard of an alien invasion that’s just set the apocalypse in motion but he liked them all too much to let them die so he made this perfect house and now if they would all just quarantine themselves there and pretend everything is fine while the world burns around them, he’d love that and I swear this is literally a nightmare I had last week.

A hooded figure, standing in front of Han Solo’s frozen-in-carbonite form, addresses Jabba the Hutt by hologram in Star Wars: War of the Bounty Hunters #1, (2023).

Image: Charles Soule, Steve McNiven/Marvel Comics

Marvel’s Star Wars comics kicked off their own crossover this week with a shocking twist: The whole thing is about a major character from Solo: A Star Wars Story.

Crush prepares hot chocolate in a moka pot while arguing testily with Red Arrow in Crush & Lobo #1, (2023).

Image: Mariko Tamaki, Amancay Nahuelpan/DC Comics

Race representation can be tricky when it comes to aliens characters raised on Earth, like Crush, an abandoned alien baby who was raised in the US by Latino parents. But when a super-strong girl is standing around, biceps bulging out of the tee she clearly ripped the sleeves off of herself, brewing herself a moka pot and griping about how her girlfriend broke up with her, I have only one thing to say: Crush is Latinx representation and also does she want my number?

The Avengers clash with Hulk and the Harpy in a chaotic double wide panel, as She-Hulk, nearly lost in the fray, says “no,” in The Immortal Hulk #47, (2023).

Image: Al Ewing, Joe Bennett/Marvel Comics

There are only three more issues of Immortal Hulk left and boy howdy am I going to miss Joe Bennett’s page spreads.

Ragman picks up a book titled “Justice League Dark 2024: Authors Notes” and opens it to find a paragraph describing Zatanna’s dark secret. He slaps the book shut with a furtive glance at the reader in Justice League #62 (2023).

Image: Ram V, Xermanico/DC Comics

Props to Ram V for writing this exposition-filled gag, but extra props to Xermanico for rendering it in a way that made me choke laughing.

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